“Cutting off your nose to spite your face” was one of Mom’s favorite sayings. It wasn’t usually directed at me as I realized how silly a concept this was. She said it often enough it stuck with me. Here’s Wikipedia on the subject: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cutting_off_the_nose_to_spite_the_face (note Wikipedia is a bit graphic with its examples). The point being is you are causing yourself more problems than you are exacting in revenge or pique against the person you are trying to harm. I am including vindictiveness as in a way, a person doing this is being vindictive although more to themselves than to the persons they are trying to get back at.
I thought this was a good Forgiveness Sundays post.
I met a self-published writer a while back and he was big on cutting off his nose to spite his face. He was also big on being vindictive. At a minimum, he was bragging he does both of these things. He knows it’s wrong, but he cares more about cutting off his nose to spite his face and being vindictive in other ways. When he was younger, he had children make fun of him in the petty ways children will do. This was 25 – 30 years ago. He has included their names as bad guys in his books. That’s a recipe for a lawsuit. He didn’t mention the names, but some of the names in his books aren’t that common.
I also had boys and girls treat me meanly when I was that age. I mentioned it in this post – Forgiveness and Vindictive Don’t Mix – Forgiveness Sundays August 9, 2020. However, the Bible verse, Romans 12:19, made the point about vengeance belonging to God. Once I recognized this, I started praying for those who treated me badly that they may get saved if they aren’t saved yet. I realized they were being immature and didn’t hold it against them. They were children. I hope they outgrew it as they got older.
From my perspective cutting off your nose figuratively only hurts you. Seems counterproductive at best and if people know this about you, I could see some of them egging you on to keep it up.
Other Forgiveness Sundays posts: https://upsdownsfamilyhistory.wordpress.com